FUNNY NEWS

A man in Singapore has filed a lawsuit against a woman for $3 million, claiming that she caused emotional “trauma” to his life when she told him she wasn’t interested in a romantic relationship with him.... Read more »

WASHINGTON—Under fire for their role in alleged sexual abuse, the nation’s children were rocked by a getting molested scandal, sources confirmed Tuesday. “How can we continue to even trust the children community if they go around... Read more »

After 23 years in the NFL, including a brief 40-day retirement followed by a final season with the Buccaneers, Tom Brady has finally decided to retire again. The Onion asked his fans to describe how they... Read more »

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LOS ANGELES—In an incident widely criticized as racial profiling, sources reported Thursday that L.A. police officers had stopped a local Black man who they claimed fit the description of a giant, fire-breathing reptile that was currently... Read more »

CHICAGO—In a hit-and-run expected to leave your loved ones devastated, a new report released this week found that there were only 18 days left until you would be struck and killed by the all-new 2023 Kia... Read more »

Hey ladies, have you ever just stared at your man and wondered what he was thinking? Relax! Your man isn't thinking about other women. We assembled a panel of man experts (who are men) and they've... Read more »

U.S. — The Japanese "Queen of Tidy" Marie Kondo has announced a brand new Netflix series following the birth of her third child. Whereas her previous show, Tidying Up with Marie Kondo, focused on a minimalist... Read more »

WASHINGTON, D.C. — According to sources, President Biden's team is planning to submerge the President in a bacta tank tonight so his mind and body will be prepared for his upcoming State of the Union address.... Read more »

Massachusetts Democrats have proposed a bill that would allow prisoners to donate their organs for reduced sentences, giving people up to a year off their prison sentence “on the condition that the incarcerated individual has donated... Read more »

WATERTOWN, SD — A local mother caused irreparable harm to her teenage son today, committing the cardinal sin of existing outside of the family home and being visible to anyone he knows.... Read more »

LOS ANGELES—Explaining that he was really more of a “podcast person,” pop star Harry Styles told reporters Monday that he figured he should listen to his album now that it had won a Grammy. “Well, if... Read more »

A former head of food services at a south suburban school district has been charged in a massive embezzlement scheme in which she allegedly stole more than 11,000 cases of chicken wings valued at $1.5 million... Read more »

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LOS ANGELES, CA — In a rare public statement, The Prince of Darkness has distanced himself from last night's Grammys performance by Sam Smith, which he denounced as "cringy" and "appalling."... Read more »

LA JOLLA, CA — Local man Josiah Burt veered dangerously close to ending his day in peace after hours of productive work, family time, and spiritual sensitivity. Reports say that while brushing his teeth, he visited... Read more »

In response to new rules issued by the administration of Gov. Ron DeSantis, teachers are being ordered to remove all books from libraries and classrooms until they can be approved by a state-trained “certified media specialist.”... Read more »

PORTSMOUTH, NH—Exclaiming with hypothetical delight upon receiving the correspondence from the vice president’s husband, local imaginary person Caitlin Hofstadter reportedly reacted to a Democratic National Committee fundraising message Monday by crying out, “Wowie zowie, an email... Read more »

ATLANTA—The professional football world was reportedly rocked Monday when the Super Company issued a press release announcing that it would not renew its sponsorship contract with the NFL’s championship bowl game. “Following some underperformance in terms... Read more »

BALTIMORE—Providing further insight into modern eating habits, a study published Monday by researchers at Johns Hopkins University found that a majority of Americans no longer bother to unwrap their hamburgers before eating them. “The number of... Read more »

A woman is refusing to be her sister-in-law's bridesmaid after claiming she ruined her wedding. At first, the bride thought she was joking, having believed they'd already buried the hatchet... Read more »

A widowed woman who sadly lost her husband more than two decades ago still considers herself to be a married woman but says her sister takes a different view entirely... Read more »

A savvy woman has been praised for her game-changing painting life hack that's 'so much easier' than using masking tape - she says it's her 'favourite time-saving tip'... Read more »

A mum has been branded 'entitled' after she refused to make her 17-year-old son give up his bus seat for an elderly woman - as he was 'feeling dizzy' and needed to sit... Read more »

The Jack's Burger Bites bag, which still displayed the snack's price and contained crumbs, was used as an envelope, which Depop shoppers described as 'zero waste gone too far'... Read more »

A woman was left horrified after her mother shared the location of her baby shower with over 500 Facebook friends - and when she challenged her mum, she said she was 'overreacting'... Read more »

The 'horrified' parent claims the teacher has previously used her daughter as a 'behaviour buffer' for disruptive pupils in her class - and she did not want her child's day out to be ruined... Read more »

A woman has fumed that neighbours are using a path on the side of her house as a shortcut to their home without permission - it's even allowing them direct eyeline into her house... Read more »

The mother-in-law has made comments about the paleness of the baby's skin and mentioned it is a shame he did not have lighter hair and the mum is far from happy... Read more »

A man has been branded 'selfish' by his wife after he left her at home with their three-month-old baby daughter - so that he could attend the funeral of his sister... Read more »

A bride-to-be claims she's no longer inviting her sister to her wedding after realising she wasn't supportive of her getting married to a man she's only known for a few short months... Read more »

As a joke, the woman added to her Tinder profile that she worked at the famous Dunder Mifflin office, but the guy did not get it and asked if there were vacancies... Read more »

Experts have shared their ways to manage the stress you may face in a day in order to stop it from ruining your positive outlook as it's revealed 7.23am is the most stressful time of day... Read more »

Sleep researchers at London's Goldsmith's University had noticed a spooky correlation between people's beliefs in ghosts and the supernatural, and the quality of their sleep... Read more »

A mum confessed there's one pet hate she has when she's doing the washing up - and her husband knows this but does it on purpose so he can 'watch her head explode'... Read more »

A single mum was overjoyed to learn she'd earned a place at the prestigious university and struggled to understand why her friend did not support the plan which she hoped could give her children a better... Read more »

Mirror reporter Julia Banim had long assumed her method of cooking roast potatoes was best, but was left eating her words after pitting it against two popular viral hacks... Read more »

The man has been lauded as 'husband of the year' after sharing his ingenious hack to help his wife get a restful night sleep without feeling like she is squishing the baby... Read more »

Scientists have found that men do not view mess in the same way as women, but this is not an excuse for men to not do anything - as researchers said that men need to change... Read more »

The woman had been browsing signs on Etsy when she stumbled across some with grammatical errors, but the seller was not happy to be given the constructive criticism... Read more »

BELIEVED TO BE the first of its kind in Ireland, one local resident left virtually speechless by the devastation wrought by the earthquakes in Turkey and Syria has managed to convey his sorrow, solidarity and condolences... Read more »

US INTELLIGENCE services are slowly responding to the discovery with a Chinese spy balloon over the skies of America with the NSA particularly incensed. “So what, you think it’s okay for your little balloon to hover... Read more »

Talk about igniting a firestorm:... Read more »

RESIDENTS FEAR FOR THEIR LIVESTOCK Oklahoma residents are in a panic after reports of strange creatures known as “chupacabras” terrorizing the suburban town of Edmond. Eyewitnesses describe the beasts as ... READ MORE The post Chupacabras... Read more »

Nope, this isn't The Babylon Bee.... Read more »

Move over January 6th! Make way for February 6th!... Read more »

WHAT State-backed club hasn’t broken 100 plus financial regulations governing Premier League football club finance? It hardly seems worth making a fuss about and yet Manchester City are in hot water and face the potential of... Read more »

WOMEN have confirmed that having a complete stranger shove their fingernails into various different boxes and layer paste on them is the highest form of relaxation.... Read more »

WATCHING on in horror and feeling helpless when it comes to helping those desperately in need after the devastating earthquakes in Turkey and Syria, local man James O’Bannon did what little he could by donating to... Read more »

STANDING there, cock out, when your trouser pocket begins to vibrate a merry tune? How does she know these are the times to call?... Read more »

MUSIC POWERHOUSE Beyoncé’s legacy lies in tatters after 37-year-old Waterford man Michael Cassidy expressed extreme confusion at the news the Renaissance singer now holds the record for most Grammy wins. “But that doesn’t make sense because... Read more »

ENERGY firms raking in billions of pounds of profit are at a loss as to why nobody is congratulating them.... Read more »

A WOMAN is mortified after being told of all the wild shit she pulled while tripping on a post-cardio rush of endorphins.... Read more »

COME in! Obviously I’d prefer to give you ‘the house tour’, but that’s not an option, so let’s pretend my cramped studio flat above a kebab shop is a liveable dwelling.... Read more »

Eric Adams has spent the last several months chastising the Right, particularly Ron DeSantis and Greg Abbott, for its "inhumane" treatment of illegal immigrants, sending them out of the states and cities that don't want them... Read more »

You would think hyper-sensitive woke places, like New York, would notice something fishy like serving fried chicken and watermelon on the first day of Black History Month, but somehow this keeps happening.... Read more »

What do you think?... Read more »

We throw around terms like "cult" and "cultism" all the time, especially on the Right, but nothing compares to the cult of transgenderism. It's anti-science, anti-nature, anti-human, and anti-God.... Read more »

Last week, Microsoft's search engine Bing momentarily and apparently accidentally released ChatGPT integrated search feature.... Read more »

Check it out 👇... Read more »