FUNNY NEWS

A man in Singapore has filed a lawsuit against a woman for $3 million, claiming that she caused emotional “trauma” to his life when she told him she wasn’t interested in a romantic relationship with him.... Read more »

WASHINGTON—Under fire for their role in alleged sexual abuse, the nation’s children were rocked by a getting molested scandal, sources confirmed Tuesday. “How can we continue to even trust the children community if they go around... Read more »

After 23 years in the NFL, including a brief 40-day retirement followed by a final season with the Buccaneers, Tom Brady has finally decided to retire again. The Onion asked his fans to describe how they... Read more »

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LOS ANGELES—In an incident widely criticized as racial profiling, sources reported Thursday that L.A. police officers had stopped a local Black man who they claimed fit the description of a giant, fire-breathing reptile that was currently... Read more »

CHICAGO—In a hit-and-run expected to leave your loved ones devastated, a new report released this week found that there were only 18 days left until you would be struck and killed by the all-new 2023 Kia... Read more »

Hey ladies, have you ever just stared at your man and wondered what he was thinking? Relax! Your man isn't thinking about other women. We assembled a panel of man experts (who are men) and they've... Read more »

U.S. — The Japanese "Queen of Tidy" Marie Kondo has announced a brand new Netflix series following the birth of her third child. Whereas her previous show, Tidying Up with Marie Kondo, focused on a minimalist... Read more »

WASHINGTON, D.C. — According to sources, President Biden's team is planning to submerge the President in a bacta tank tonight so his mind and body will be prepared for his upcoming State of the Union address.... Read more »

Massachusetts Democrats have proposed a bill that would allow prisoners to donate their organs for reduced sentences, giving people up to a year off their prison sentence “on the condition that the incarcerated individual has donated... Read more »

WATERTOWN, SD — A local mother caused irreparable harm to her teenage son today, committing the cardinal sin of existing outside of the family home and being visible to anyone he knows.... Read more »

LOS ANGELES—Explaining that he was really more of a “podcast person,” pop star Harry Styles told reporters Monday that he figured he should listen to his album now that it had won a Grammy. “Well, if... Read more »

A former head of food services at a south suburban school district has been charged in a massive embezzlement scheme in which she allegedly stole more than 11,000 cases of chicken wings valued at $1.5 million... Read more »

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LOS ANGELES, CA — In a rare public statement, The Prince of Darkness has distanced himself from last night's Grammys performance by Sam Smith, which he denounced as "cringy" and "appalling."... Read more »

LA JOLLA, CA — Local man Josiah Burt veered dangerously close to ending his day in peace after hours of productive work, family time, and spiritual sensitivity. Reports say that while brushing his teeth, he visited... Read more »

In response to new rules issued by the administration of Gov. Ron DeSantis, teachers are being ordered to remove all books from libraries and classrooms until they can be approved by a state-trained “certified media specialist.”... Read more »

PORTSMOUTH, NH—Exclaiming with hypothetical delight upon receiving the correspondence from the vice president’s husband, local imaginary person Caitlin Hofstadter reportedly reacted to a Democratic National Committee fundraising message Monday by crying out, “Wowie zowie, an email... Read more »

ATLANTA—The professional football world was reportedly rocked Monday when the Super Company issued a press release announcing that it would not renew its sponsorship contract with the NFL’s championship bowl game. “Following some underperformance in terms... Read more »

BALTIMORE—Providing further insight into modern eating habits, a study published Monday by researchers at Johns Hopkins University found that a majority of Americans no longer bother to unwrap their hamburgers before eating them. “The number of... Read more »

WATCHING on in horror and feeling helpless when it comes to helping those desperately in need after the devastating earthquakes in Turkey and Syria, local man James O’Bannon did what little he could by donating to... Read more »

Scientists have found that men do not view mess in the same way as women, but this is not an excuse for men to not do anything - as researchers said that men need to change... Read more »

MUSIC POWERHOUSE Beyoncé’s legacy lays in tatters after 37-year-old Waterford man Michael Cassidy expressed extreme confusion at the news the Renaissance singer now holds the record for most Grammy wins. “But that doesn’t make sense because... Read more »

The woman had been browsing signs on Etsy when she stumbled across some with grammatical errors, but the seller was not happy to be given the constructive criticism... Read more »

An eco-friendly house with its roof shaped like a cowboy hat in Huntsville, Texas, America, has gone up for rent on property site Zillow for $900 (£750) per month... Read more »

His fiancé had gone out to eat and play mini golf with just her kids and left his 10-year-old alone at home - she defended herself by saying she brought food home but the dad was... Read more »

Nesh Pillay, 32, from Toronto, Canada, had been dating Johannes Jakope, 30, for just over a year when she lost her memory at random after having a nap while watching a movie with her boyfriend one... Read more »

An adult content creator who looks like Maya Jama has seen her earnings double since Love Island came back by recreating looks that the presenter wears on the show... Read more »

The mum did not want to deal with family drama and mother-in-law's pushiness on holiday but some have said this is the wrong reason to plan your child's party... Read more »

A woman claims she does not know what to think after receiving a message from a 'suspicious' Facebook profile intended to warn her about her husband's behaviour... Read more »

The owner of a bridal shop has shared some of the mistakes brides and their friends and family make when attending wedding dress appointments - including the comments that should be avoided... Read more »

The man thought his in-laws were joking when they said he could not sleep next to his wife and had to stay on the sofa, so he decided to leave but his relatives were not impressed... Read more »

Eric Adams has spent the last several months chastising the Right, particularly Ron DeSantis and Greg Abbott, for its "inhumane" treatment of illegal immigrants, sending them out of the states and cities that don't want them... Read more »

You would think hyper-sensitive woke places, like New York, would notice something fishy like serving fried chicken and watermelon on the first day of Black History Month, but somehow this keeps happening.... Read more »

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We throw around terms like "cult" and "cultism" all the time, especially on the Right, but nothing compares to the cult of transgenderism. It's anti-science, anti-nature, anti-human, and anti-God.... Read more »

Last week, Microsoft's search engine Bing momentarily and apparently accidentally released ChatGPT integrated search feature.... Read more »

Check it out 👇... Read more »

Well, well, well, if it isn't the consequences of "progressive" policies come home to roost.... Read more »

Sidney Beckles has gone viral on TikTok for looking like Prince Harry's wife Meghan Markle. Some people say they look like 'twins' but she always get trolled online... Read more »